We Forgot We Were Growing Up Too

When I was twenty years old, I wasn’t thinking about being fifty-two.

Honestly, I wasn’t even thinking about thirty.

I was just living in the moment.

We got married young. We spent our honeymoon in Las Vegas, where I wasn’t even old enough to be there legally. Let’s just say there may have been a fake ID involved. Looking back now, I can’t help but laugh. We were young, probably a little immature, and convinced we had all the time in the world.

A few years later we were having babies.

I wasn’t thinking about what life would look like decades later. I was thinking about diapers, bedtime stories, preschool, and trying to figure out how to be a good mom.

Then somehow those little years started stacking on top of each other.

One minute you’re walking your son into kindergarten.

The next, he’s becoming an EMT.

Your daughter is headed off to college.

One gets married.

The other starts building a career.

Then one day your oldest has babies of his own, and somehow you’ve become “KK.”

Nobody really tells you that’s how it happens.

There isn’t one moment when you suddenly feel older. It’s thousands of little moments that quietly add up while you’re busy watching everyone else grow.

You spend years celebrating their milestones that you hardly notice you’re reaching your own.

Somewhere between raising kids and becoming grandparents…

we forgot we were growing up too.

Of course, I wouldn’t trade any of it.

Not for one second.

But every now and then I catch myself wondering what I’d give to sit across the table from my four-year-old son again. Or my five-year-old daughter with her little voice telling me about her day.

Just for an afternoon.

Then I look across the room and see my granddaughters.

Their sweet smiles.

Those tiny little baby teeth.

The wisps of fine hair that never seem to stay brushed.

And that side-eye…

I have no idea where she learned that, but it’s already legendary.

I know how quickly this season will pass because I’ve lived it before.

So these days I find myself lingering a little longer.

Taking one more picture.

Accepting one more hug.

Watching a little more closely.

Because if life has taught me anything, it’s this:

The years don’t ask permission before they pass.

And somewhere in the middle of watching everyone we love grow up…

we do too.

Maybe that’s why I still reach for my camera so often. Somewhere along the way I realized photographs can’t stop time, but they can remind us just how beautiful it was while it was passing.

Photo Note: I took this photo during our annual family vacation in Marco Island, Florida. I wasn’t planning to use it for this post, but the boardwalk felt like a quiet reminder of the journey life takes us on, one season leading gently into the next.